Brian’s Reflection: Thursday, May 31, 2007


Facing west from California's shores,
Inquiring, tireless, seeking what is yet unfound,
I, a child, very old, over waves, towards the house of maternity,
the land of migrations, look afar,
Look off the shores of my Western sea, the circle almost circled;
For starting westward from Hindustan, from the vales of Kashmere,
From Asia, from the north, from the God, the sage, and the hero,
From the south, from the flowery peninsulas and the spice islands,
Long having wander'd since, round the earth having wander'd,
Now I face home again, very pleas'd and joyous,
(But where is what I started for so long ago? And why is it yet unfound?)

- Walt Whitman, acclaimed American poet,
born in West Hills, Long Island, 1819


What can I say? I love Walt Whitman. I could stand on the California shore and gaze out and conjure up in my mind and heart all of the Hindustans and Vales of Kashmeres that I have seen in my life. Unlike Whitman, I do not feel that I have a “home” in the World - nor do I want one in the physical sense. I am a typical Cancerian - I make my home wherever I find myself. I have lived in many places in my years – and almost always I go to bed at dawn with every picture hung and every carpet placed and every candle lit before a holy icon or two. My “home” is within my inner sight. It exists in my imagination. No place I have lived has disappointed me, I miss none of them (ohm except perhaps Montfort), and I have forgotten the details of most of them.

But Oh I can relate to the poet’s last words! “But where is what I started for so long ago? And why is it yet unfound?”

I started for the Mystery called God decades ago, without even knowing what “God” was/is. I am not disappointed that It is yet unfound! That is the nature of the Mystery.

I shall keep “facing home”. Facing within. Like Whitman, I am a wanderer.

Brian+